Getting Pissed About A Poorly Worded Urinal Claim

So, where I work they have these high-efficiency urinals installed.  Above them, there is a placard that brings this fact to your attention, which reads:

This urinal flushes with only 16 oz. of water, saving 88% more water per use than a standard one-gallon urinal.

I cringe every time I read it as I'm taking care of my business.  The big problem here is not the math, as it is obvious that the 88% number comes from 16oz / 128oz (one gallon).  The problem is the use of the word "saving," which makes the statement completely untrue.

In order to compare two things, a baseline must be established.  Person A earns 25% more than Person B.  So, we first establish a baseline.  In this case, the baseline is what Person B earns.  Next, we compare what Person A earns to what Person B earns.  Simple.

What is the baseline for the claim above?  In order to figure out how much more water the high-efficiency urinal saves compared to the standard one-gallon urinal, we need to establish the standard urinal's level of saving.

Urinals don't save any water, instead they consume it.  And, there lies the problem.  The baseline is a one-gallon urinal that saves zero water.  The current high-efficiency urinal also saves zero water.  Thus, there is no difference in the amount of water saved by the urinal.  This makes the entire sentence somewhat nonsensical, and it irks me.

Those who wrote that sentence need only make a minor edit, creating the much better worded (and true) statement:

This urinal flushes with only 16 oz. of water, consuming 88% less water per use than a standard one-gallon urinal.

That's it.  I'm done ranting about this one... well, that is, until the next time I have to go take a piss while I'm at work.

Belonging Is Difficult

I may be really off-base here, but I find the verb belong to be strange, as it seems that its present participle form is not really ever used -- at least, it doesn't sound right to me.  It is okay as a gerund, but not as an actual verb.

These sound perfectly fine (non-present participle):

I belong in that group.
The dog belongs in a nice home.

These sound totally wrong, but I admit that they are probably grammatically correct:

I am belonging in that group.
The dog is belonging in a nice home.

As a gerund, it sounds fine as well:

Belonging is important.
Belonging to that group gives him special privileges.

I couldn't think of another verb where the present participle sounds really wrong and awkward.

Anyway, I found this to be strange.  Any other verbs out there that are difficult in this way?

My Highest Scoring Scrabble Game Ever

I regularly play Scrabble with a friend, and I'll say that while I have an edge on her, we're similarly skilled. Anyway, I finished a game against her today with a score that far surpasses any that I've ever had... a whopping 692 points (691 + 1 for her unplayed tile).

It was a triple bingo game for me, which is rare, but not ridiculous. What made it ridiculous is that two of the three bingoes were of the elusive triple-triple variety (SLUICING and REINVITE for 149 and 185, respectively).

Here's the final board along with the moves.

Don't Forget the Attachment

I accidentally ran into an automatic feature of Gmail the other day that I found useful, as it saved me from having to send a corrective e-mail. So, it turns out that if the body of your e-mail contains text that is indicative of your intent to attach a file, but you neglect to attach a file, then Gmail warns you of your potential omission.

After a little playing around, here are some phrases that trigger the warning:

"Attached is"
"Attached are"
"I've attached"
"Find the attached"
"See the attached"
"Attached file"

Here are some phrases that do not trigger the warning, but probably should:

"Attached a file"
"A file attached"
"Check out the attachment"
"File attachment"
"Attached document"
"Attached spreadsheet"

When a cup isn't a cup...

Here's a piece of trivia that I found interesting, and frankly, a bit strange.

You likely have seen that many food packaging labels in the U.S. describe serving sizes in units of cups. You're also likely to have come across cup unit measurements in various cooking/baking recipes.

However, what you're not likely to know is that these sizes are not the same. A cup used for nutrition labeling is dictated by U.S. laws to be 240mL, or roughly 8.115 customary fluid ounces. This is a little more than 1.44% more volume than the standard cup used in all your favorite recipes.

And, I thought I'd throw this out at you all as well... a Japanese cup is defined to be only 200 mL. I'd be interested to know if Japanese cookbooks refer to this smaller volume cup, the traditional one, or some other definition altogether.

Isn't it about time that we just standardize the definition? Seems silly to me the way things are today (not that I've ever noticed the distinctions).

An Incongruous, Yet Acceptable Pronunciation

As if I need to tell anyone, I'm really a bit particular when it comes to words. Some things just bother me, and I feel the need to get them off my chest.

Everyone knows the word mischievous. It is generally pronounced mis-che-vuhs. So, why is the pronunciation, mis-chee-vee-uhs, acceptable? According to several dictionaries, it is one of the pronunciations provided. And to make matters worse, it seems that a good many people do, in fact, use this pronunciation.

I understand that there are a lot of -ious words out there that might bring about some confusion such as devious or previous. But, the word mischievous does not end in -ious. On what world is it okay to insert a syllable where nothing in the spelling of the world would dictate it. There is no i or e in the -vous part... so how can anyone think it is right? Argh. This just makes no sense to me.

I don't mind if there are alternate pronunciations for a word. I just very much prefer that the word's spelling can make some logical sense of the alternate pronunciation. Another thing... if we're allowed to say mis-chee-vee-uhs, then how come we aren't allowed to say gree-vee-uhs for grievous? After all, they both come from base words ending in -ief.

Anyway, how about we all just agree to say mis-che-vuhs in the future and work towards a better future by removing this abominable pronunciation from our language. It's just horrible, and it kills me to know that it is acceptable.

While we're paving the way for pronunciation changes, I'd like to add A-pathetic (long A sound) as an acceptable alternate pronunciation for apathetic. I don't understand why it isn't already acceptable given that so many a- prefix words are correctly pronounced with the long A, such as aseptic, amoral, or asexual.

The More You Know

For the most part, those that are reading this are American. This post is intended for that audience.

We all know that fanny is a slang term for the butt. It's not vulgar, and it is often used as a non-offensive substitute for any of the less appropriate words describing a butt. But, let me ask this... how many of you know that the word fanny means something completely different in British and Australian slang?

In the UK and Australia, fanny is a rather vulgar term referring to female genitalia. I'm a bit shocked that there's such a striking difference in their meaning. Also, in case you were wondering, don't call that bag you wear strapped around your waist a fanny pack if you are ever traveling in those countries. Understandably, they have different names for it. Call it either a hip pack or a bum bag.

I just learned of this yesterday, and I felt it was my duty to make this public service announcement. I'm surprised that I've never come across it before. I should get out more and learn me some culture.

I8HRO@DPR

This is something silly that I came up with when I woke up this morning... maybe I was hungry.

I 8 H R O @ D P R

Unintentional Traffic Humor

So, I was sitting in some minor traffic yesterday on my way to work when I glanced at my rear view mirror. I had to do a double take when I saw a female driving the car behind me that had a vulgar word for a part of the female anatomy pasted across its windshield. I turned around quickly to learn that she was apparently a Looney Tunes fan.

The full message was: I TAWT I TAW A PUDDY TAT!

Due to the symmetry of the individual letters, TAWT sure does look funny in a mirror. I wonder if this ever crossed her mind before she put the stickers on her windshield... my guess is not.

Smell, I Mean, Spell My Finger

I am digging this fast-paced action word game called Spell My Finger on AdultSwim.com. My current best is 23,660, which was good enough to make the top 100 scores.

If you like word games, you might enjoy this one. So, check it out.

100 Most Common English Words

I just took this online quiz thing that gives you five minutes to try and guess at the 100 most common words in the English language. I really suck. I got 46 out of 100, and after seeing the list of the ones I missed, I think I should have done much better.

100 Most Common English Words Quiz

Give it a try.

New Words For My Vocabulary

So, JC's been reading The Ambassadors by Henry James. Let's just say that it's not light reading. James's sheer wordiness and his penchant for incredibly complex sentence structures is mostly to blame. JC is an incredibly fast reader, but upon tackling this book, she has found that her reading rate was roughly halved. She's hopeful that over time, she might be able to adapt to his writing style, and regain the lost speed. In any case, I don't think I have any inclination to read the book after she's done. Ha ha.

However, I started flipping through the book some only to find tough words after reading a few daunting passages. I figured what better way to expand my vocabulary. After some skimming, which resulted in near zero comprehension of the text, here were a few words where neither of us knew the definitions. We both guessed at their meanings using the context, but we were never quite right.

fuliginous - Sooty; dark colored. [Haha, Blogger spellchecker doesn't even know this word.]

physiognomy - Art or science of discovering temperament and character from outward appearance.

efflorescence - The process of flowering; period of blossoming.

interlocutor - Someone who takes part in a dialogue or conversation.

animadvert - To make harsh criticism; censure.

And, here's another word I learned recently from an entirely different book.

profligate - Completely given up to self-indulgence and licentiousness; wildly extravagant.

My Lifelong Misspelling

I'm usually a real spelling and grammar nazi. Well, today I was quite surprised to learn that I've been spelling a common word completely incorrectly for my entire life. You know the word, stationary, right?

Well, I thought I did too... it means not changing/moving, or it means the paper stuff for writing letters. And, that would be the problem. The word defined by the latter is not stationary, but stationery.

I am honestly surprised that this mistake has slipped through the cracks for as long as it has. I guess stationery is another one of those words with the -ery ending, like cemetery. Strange.

Just wanted to share. A friend of mine who is quite good with words apparently was not aware of the subtle spelling difference either. Maybe it's a common mistake.

Three Sheets To The Wind

So, I just recently started watching a show called Three Sheets on the Mojo channel. The show is all about drinking excessively in a bunch of different countries. It's on its third season already, and I find it highly entertaining.

Before watching this show, I had never even heard of the expression three sheets to the wind. This was a shocker to some, and I guess it's quite a common expression. Somehow it slipped through the cracks. It basically means being totally drunk and wasted. Not sure where I would have heard it... I know for sure that no one I know has used the expression to describe excessive drunkenness.

Anyway, in case anyone wanted to know about its origin, I did some investigating. It's a nautical thing. Sheets are ropes that hold sails in place. When you have three sheets blowing in the wind, the sails will flap around and cause the boat to get really wobbly much like a drunk person. From what I read, sailors used to rate the level of drunkenness using the sheets scale... from one sheet (tipsy) to three sheets (fall over drunk).

My Portmanteau

So, I was having a conversation earlier about random stuff, and of course, the subject of Hurricane Ike came up. Anyway, during this conversation I invented a portmanteau to describe what the government might call for when the certain flooding occurs.

< ... drum roll, please ... >

They might call for a State of Submergency.

Someone thought it was so good that it must have been a fairly common one. So, how can we get a quick estimate on its popularity? Well, you do the Google test and look at the hit count.

State of Emergency: 4.4MM hits
State of Submergency: 3 hits

Yes, that's right... a whopping 3 hits. I'm going to lay claim to that term based on this quick test. Now, it's time to market it... though it's really in poor taste now, I think it'd be pretty sweet if one day we saw a headline that referenced it.

Find The Bingos

Okay, I just played some Scrabble, and thought it'd be fun for you word people to hone your skills a bit. Here's a board, and it's my turn to play. I really felt there was a bingo (use all 7 tiles) here, but I was running low on time and I was pretty much going to win the game (I was up 60 points and my opponent had 4 tiles left: INRW). So, I just gave up.

I went back over the game and I did manage to find one, and I was curious how many there actually were. I used an anagrammer to help me find them. To the best of my knowledge, there are 4 of them. Two of them are exotic words, and the other two are common. One of the common words would require you to know the Scrabble 3's though.

Anyway, here's the board. See if you can spot any of the possible bingos.

Three Flavors of Corn

I learned a couple new words over the weekend, and I thought I'd share. I now present to you the three corns: Unicorn, Bicorn, and Tricorn.

Defending My Word Cubes Crown

I'm going to toot my own horn here... I just got notification confirming me as the official winner of the June '08 Word Cubes tournament. Top prize was a tidy $789, which should cover the expenses of my upcoming Vegas trip.

The game at the bar is played on one of those touch screen kiosk machines, so it helps to have quick hands as well as the ability to use both of them. And, while I've never found an exact version (with same scoring rules and bonuses), here's an online version of the basic game.

Happy Friday the 13th!

Rock Band and License Plate Game

You all read before about how much I suck at Guitar Hero. So, it comes as no surprise that I also suck at Rock Band. I think I am best at the singing and worst at the drums. And, for anyone that has ever seen me do karaoke, you have a pretty good idea of how bad I am at this game. I guess I simply have no rhythm. I should stick to word games.

Now, speaking of word games, here's a game I invented long ago to help pass the time on long drives. It's really quite simple, and I think it's pretty fun. You can also come up with various ways to score.

First, the game only works with license plates with 3 letters in a row. For you California folks, this is easy to find... since all the auto plates have the format #LLL###. Okay, so here's what you want to do. You want to find a word that contains those 3 letters in that order (but, they need not be consecutive). As you would expect, some patterns are really easy, others are really tough, and some are just impossible.

If we have a plate that read 1AFG123, then we're looking for AFG in that order, but not necessarily consecutive. One legitimate answer would be crAFtinG. Now, you can just play this for speed against friends, where the first person that produces a legitimate word wins the point. Or, you can play the more advanced and more challenging version where the goal is to get the shortest valid word. Everyone gets a chance to improve upon the current word and it's not turn-based... it's a free for all. If you can improve upon the best, then you just blurt it out to stake your claim.

Like, say we have a few players in the game. I could start with say deAFeninG (9 letters). I could then blurt out an improvement... crAFting (8 letters). Another player can then shout out rAFtinG (7 letters), and someone else could come back with AFGhan (6 letters). If no one else can't find one shorter, then whoever said it wins that point.

Of course, you should alter the rules where you see fit. One good rule is that if the 3 letters form a word already, then it's pointless and shouldn't be used. There are lots of ways to tweak the game to make it more enjoyable.

Anyway, if you like words, give this game a try some time.

Chupacabra and Felons

Well, I recently learned a not so often used definition of the word, felon. Apparently, in addition to the common definition, it can also refer to an inflammation of the fingertip near the end of a nail. I just find it really odd that this sort of physical ailment would be given the same name as a criminal. Or, maybe it's the other way around. Anyway, that's the word of the day.

Another thing I heard about recently is the Chupacabra. I have never heard of it before, and I've asked quite a few people and most had never heard of it before either. It is some sort of urban legend / mythological vampire beast that feasts on the blood of goats. Now, you've got the monster of the day. Anyone come across the term for this beast before?